Just back from a run in a quadrant of the city that's new enough to be thrilling, to a playlist of 26 sinead o'conner songs. didn't even know there was a newspaper called the korean times but their offices are just a few blocks away and my new neighborhood starbucks is a friendly one. the barista knew people by name and there's a charge that comes with knowing i'll be around long enough for her to learn mine.

i've sweat enough this morning to accomplish two very important things:

inspiration to hang the shower curtain in this new and nearly never used bathroom (ah, permanence)

wash away the horrible moment of yesterday that followed me through dinner and sleep. here it is:

I. the nastiest and most demanding client ever known called my cell phone. twice. to demand something without a please or a thanks or a sorry to bother you. i, of course, assured her i was happy to hear from her and that no, no. it's no trouble. i'll get to that right away.

II. the nasty email written to a colleague, titled "need to vent" and proceeding to rip her to pieces

III. the realization, as i hit send, that i'd included her name in the address field

IV. the frantic recall message attempt, shaking like i do when i almost get in a car accident

V. her reply confirming that she did, indeed, get my note.
i should mention that i'm about to embark on three weeks of travel around the world with this woman. yesterday, that thought made me sick. this morning, i'm looking at it as my chance to start over, bond as i learn what kinds of foods she likes, how she moves through airports and what makes her laugh.

in some ways, it was a good crisis. for a little while, it actually eclipsed the larger thing that's been looming: my husband of 11 months cheated on me. While he decided he needed some time to figure out "why he did it" and "if we can save this" i decided to move out and he doesn't even know where i live.